i am 
words that can describe
and be 
pain 
birth
life 
joy
death
and love that willingly faces
 
      the fear of being lost       in the great growing breadth of me 

and you

these choices apportion all i have
every shallow red-black pool of my blood
and every cry
  and surgery of this love
     pares me down
         to the exultant ivory bones of the burning parched desert i am
lost in the wild whiteness of this dream 

ben laughed so hard he shook last night
and i saw the red clay on my shaking fingers
in the dark
and i knew
my halting labored breath in this silent nothingness gives more
            of the vast ocean
                 and sheets of greening rain
                     and yes thunder
than i will ever deserve
for i now know of the joy 
held gently in this perfect bleeding heart of the world
and i now have touched the infinite velvet colors 
that are you

Richard Harrison                 10/28/98